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  1. #1

    Default A new poem by Pam Ayres.

    I have a little Satnav, it sits there in my car.
    A Satnav is a driver's friend it tells you where you are.
    I have a little Satnav, i've had it all my life. It's better than the normal ones, my Satnav is my wife.
    It gives me full instructions, especially how to drive "It's sixty miles an hour", it says, "You're doing sixty five".
    It tells me when to stop and start, and when to use the brake And tells me that it's never ever, safe to overtake.
    It tells me when a light is red, and when it goes to green It seems to know instinctively, just when to intervene.
    It lists the vehicles just in front, and all those to the rear. And taking this into account, it specifies my gear.
    I'm sure no other driver, has so helpful a device. For when we leave and lock the car, it still gives its advice.
    It fills me up with counselling, each journey's pretty fraught. So why don't I exchange it, and get a quieter sort?
    Ah well, you see, it cleans the house, makes sure I'm properly fed. It washes all my shirts and things, and keeps me warm in bed!
    Despite all these advantages, and my tendency to scoff, I only wish that now and then, I could turn the bugger off.
    It is better to wear out than to rust out.
    - Richard Chamberlain, Tour of the Hebrides

    Us husbands are a sorry lot.

  2. #2
    VoidMaster
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    Default Re: A new poem by Pam Ayres.

    LOL
    It's not the least charm of a theory that it is refutable. The hundred-times-refuted theory of "free will" owes its persistence to this charm alone; some one is always appearing who feels himself strong enough to refute it - Friedrich Nietzsche

  3. #3
    Senior Member piroska's Avatar
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    Default Re: A new poem by Pam Ayres.

    Quote Originally Posted by Roscoe View Post
    It tells me when to stop and start, and when to use the brake And tells me that it's never ever, safe to overtake.
    It tells me when a light is red, and when it goes to green It seems to know instinctively, just when to intervene.
    It lists the vehicles just in front, and all those to the rear.
    Really? Mine just says which way to go, and yes I do have the speed warning on...
    Ex-pctek

  4. #4
    Awaiting Enlightenment R2x1's Avatar
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    Default Re: A new poem by Pam Ayres.

    Quote Originally Posted by piroska View Post
    Really? Mine just says which way to go, and yes I do have the speed warning on...
    Mine has most of the features listed by Pam, and in a pinch (about half the time) it can do the go-whoa-turn from the instructee's position. That's handy and peaceful .. .. .. .. although the "telling me where to go" function remains active.
    Entropy is not what
    it used to be.



  5. #5
    Senior Member piroska's Avatar
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    Default Re: A new poem by Pam Ayres.

    So what brand model is it? I wouldn't mind one like that...but I suspect it's the car not a device you can buy, or am I wrong?
    Ex-pctek

  6. #6
    Awaiting Enlightenment R2x1's Avatar
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    Default Re: A new poem by Pam Ayres.

    AKA known as SWMBO - - - - -
    (Or Organic Auto-nag Autopilot.)
    Last edited by R2x1; 23-01-2022 at 06:59 PM.
    Entropy is not what
    it used to be.



  7. #7
    Retired old codger kenj's Avatar
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    Default Re: A new poem by Pam Ayres.

    Are we all having a bit of a giggle about piroska's posts?

    Ken

  8. #8
    Awaiting Enlightenment R2x1's Avatar
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    Default Re: A new poem by Pam Ayres.

    A bit
    (Of course, neither of us has ever missed something obvious, except maybe the dawn chorus a couple of times.)
    Entropy is not what
    it used to be.



  9. #9
    Senior Member piroska's Avatar
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    Default Re: A new poem by Pam Ayres.

    Ok, I'm thick.
    She's being a smartass.

    But I have been reading Driven lately, and there are these toys available. I quite like the lane assist and braking warning and stuff idea. If you had driven with my mum, you would too.
    She says she hates these "features" in cars now.
    Ex-pctek

  10. #10
    VoidMaster
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    Default Re: A new poem by Pam Ayres.

    Same, my cars default setting is locking the car doors after 45 seconds, so if you stop to post a letter and get waylaid, like someone talks to you, when you get back you will find the car running with doors locked and no way to get back in because the keys are in the ignition, how's that for a luxury feature?

    I only have one set of keys, new set will have to come from Aussie and costs $1,500!!!!!
    It's not the least charm of a theory that it is refutable. The hundred-times-refuted theory of "free will" owes its persistence to this charm alone; some one is always appearing who feels himself strong enough to refute it - Friedrich Nietzsche

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