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  1. #1
    Rocket Dog WalOne's Avatar
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    Talking Ba-ruppa-pum-pum;ruppa-pum-pum ... Awful Christmas Songs

    Recognise it? Ba-ruppa-pum-pum; ruppa-pum-pum?

    Little Drummer Boy? According to Patrick (Ask The Pilot) Smith, it's "without argument the most cruelly awful piece of music ever written. It was that way before Joan Jett or David Bowie got hold of it".

    Here's Patrick:

    Do not, ever, make the mistake that I once made and attempt to enjoy Christmas at a small hotel in Ghana called the Hans Cottage “Botel,” located on a lagoon just outside the city of Cape Coast. They love their Christmas music at the Hans Botel, and the compound is rigged end-to-end with speakers that blare it around the clock.

    Although you can count among those people able to tolerate Christmas music — in moderation, in context, and so long as it isn’t Sufjan Stevens — there is one blood-curdling exception. That exception is the song, “Little Drummer Boy,” which is without argument the most cruelly awful piece of music ever written. It was that way before Joan Jett or David Bowie got hold of it.

    It’s a traumatic enough song in any rendition. And at the Hans Cottage Botel they have chosen to make it the only — only! — song on their Christmastime tape loop. Over and over it plays, ceaselessly, day and night. It’s there are breakfast, it’s there again at dinner, and at every moment between. I’m not sure who the artist is, but it’s an especially treacly version with lots of high notes to set one’s skull ringing.

    “Ba-ruppa-pum-pum;ruppa-pum-pum…” as I hear it today and forever, that stammering chorus is like the thump-thump of chopper blades in the wounded mind of a Vietnam vet who Can’t Forget What He Saw. There I am, pinned down at the Botel bar, jittery and covered in sweat, my nails clattering against a bottle of Star lager while the infernal Drummer Boy warbles into the buggy air.

    “Barkeep!” I grab Kwame by the wrist. “For the love of god, man, can’t somebody make it stop?”

    Kwame just smiles. “So lovely, yes.”
    My most awful Christmas Song To Be Avoided At All Costs is Snoopy's Christmas. So far, 2018 stacks up to be a wonderful, wonderful, time (sorry, couldn't resist that). So far, just so far, I've made it through without even the faintest stanza from the Royal Guardsmen penetrating the innermost recesses of my cranium ...

    Click HERE ... O Tannenbaum, O Tannenbaum

    At least this time, I must (in the spirit of Christmas, of course) blame only myself

    So what's your most awful Christmas Song To Be Avoided At All Costs?
    Last edited by WalOne; 22-12-2018 at 08:25 AM.
    I have very high hopes that seriousness is a reversible condition.

    Dr Lester Levy


    I've studied deeply in the philosophies and religions, but cheerfulness kept breaking through.

    Leonard Cohen

  2. #2
    Seasoned Member allblack's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ba-ruppa-pum-pum;ruppa-pum-pum ... Awful Christmas Songs

    Quote Originally Posted by WalOne View Post
    So what's your most awful Christmas Song To Be Avoided At All Costs?
    Everything EXCEPT Snoopy's Christmas.

  3. #3
    Short Member pcuser42's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ba-ruppa-pum-pum;ruppa-pum-pum ... Awful Christmas Songs

    None of them.

    You Grinches
    "He who resorts to personal insults hath lost the argument."

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  4. #4
    Rocket Dog WalOne's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ba-ruppa-pum-pum;ruppa-pum-pum ... Awful Christmas Songs

    Quote Originally Posted by pcuser42 View Post
    None of them.

    You Grinches
    Bah. Humbug.

    I have very high hopes that seriousness is a reversible condition.

    Dr Lester Levy


    I've studied deeply in the philosophies and religions, but cheerfulness kept breaking through.

    Leonard Cohen

  5. #5
    VoidMaster
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    Default Re: Ba-ruppa-pum-pum;ruppa-pum-pum ... Awful Christmas Songs

    Xmas is coming far too often, each year it seems as if the last one has only just gone and here comes another one.

    I think we should have it every five years that would bring the excitement back.

    The worst song is the Countdown advert using the song: "The Final Countdown".

    I don't know which moron or chain of morons decided to use it in a Christmas advertisement, it would have been a fair number of morons from the creator through middle-management to upper-level management, but it is actually a song about nuclear war, not a happy song, it is quite dire, silly fools, you can even hear it in the feel of the song.

    They're are all probably getting fancy salaries to approve this advert except for the graphic artist that produced this abortion of an advert.

    Once upon a time when I was doing some training in graphic art I found out that the head of the teaching team, University trained, had never heard of "Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite" from Sgt Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band Album even though she was in charge of producing a carnival type show with appropriate advertising, even the professionals in NZ are parochial and insular.
    Last edited by zqwerty; 22-12-2018 at 10:37 AM.
    It's not the least charm of a theory that it is refutable. The hundred-times-refuted theory of "free will" owes its persistence to this charm alone; some one is always appearing who feels himself strong enough to refute it - Friedrich Nietzsche

  6. #6
    Remember Richard's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ba-ruppa-pum-pum;ruppa-pum-pum ... Awful Christmas Songs

    I hated Vince Martin singing about a Winter Wonderland. Hated it with a vengeance.

  7. #7
    Rocket Dog WalOne's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ba-ruppa-pum-pum;ruppa-pum-pum ... Awful Christmas Songs

    Quote Originally Posted by zqwerty View Post
    I don't know which moron or chain of morons decided to use it in a Christmas advertisement, it would have been a fair number of morons from the creator through middle-management to upper-level management, but it is actually a song about nuclear war, not a happy song, it is quite dire, silly fools, you can even hear it in the feel of the song.
    Quote Originally Posted by Richard View Post
    I hated Vince Martin singing about a Winter Wonderland. Hated it with a vengeance.
    Both you guys are right on ... the morons who decided a song about nuclear war for a Christmas advertisement or using an invented "personality" character to help sell tyres, are both instances of crass and inappropriate commercialisation.

    But hey, let's make this the fun thread I'd intended and have a laugh at ourselves if there's nothing else to laugh at ...

    Cheers

    Last edited by WalOne; 22-12-2018 at 11:00 AM.
    I have very high hopes that seriousness is a reversible condition.

    Dr Lester Levy


    I've studied deeply in the philosophies and religions, but cheerfulness kept breaking through.

    Leonard Cohen

  8. #8
    Senior Member Bobh's Avatar
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    Default

    I snapped my top dentures a few months ago. There were a few complications (a long story) so it has taken about six months to finally get them replaced. They were finally installed last Thursday. Until then I kept thinking about the children's nursery rhyme, 'All I want for Xmas is my two front teeth'.

    Windows 10 Home 64-bit, Intel Core i3 540 3.07GHz, 8 GB Dual-Channel DDR3, Gigabyte H55-USB3, Nvidia Geforce GTS 450, Hauppauge WinTV-HVR-3300

  9. #9
    Senior Member piroska's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ba-ruppa-pum-pum;ruppa-pum-pum ... Awful Christmas Songs

    Quote Originally Posted by WalOne View Post

    So what's your most awful Christmas Song To Be Avoided At All Costs?
    Most of them, but probably that rude one about not getting the right presents, you know who....

    Past it's Use By now.
    Ex-pctek

  10. #10
    CICERO FAN CLUB MEMBER prefect's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ba-ruppa-pum-pum;ruppa-pum-pum ... Awful Christmas Songs

    Quote Originally Posted by piroska View Post
    Most of them, but probably that rude one about not getting the right presents, you know who....

    Past it's Use By now.
    Wheres my bike?
    Its amazing how Potatoes give us chips,fries and Vodka.

    Get your s*** together every other vegetable.

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