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View Full Version : OT. Don't feel stupid about useing your computer.



Danger
14-03-2003, 09:14 PM
DON'T FEEL STUPID ABOUT USING YOUR COMPUTER
> >
> > Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to
> > "Press Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the
> > Any Key is.
> >
> > SAT technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard
> to
> > control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic
> bag
> >
> > the mouse was packaged in.
> >
> > Another SAT customer was asked to send a copy of her defective
> > diskettes. A few days later a letter arrived from the customer along
> with
> > photocopies of the floppies.
> >
> > Another Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer to fax
> > anything. After 40 minutes of troubleshooting, the technician discovered
>
> > the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it in front of the
>
> > monitor screen and hitting the "send" key.
> >
> > A Dell technician received a call from a customer who was enraged
> > because his computer had told him he was "bad and an invalid."
> > The tech explained that the computer's "bad command" and "invalid"
> > responses shouldn't be taken personally.
> >
> > A confused caller to IBM was having troubles printing documents.
> > He told the technician that the computer had said it "couldn't find
> > printer." The user had also tried turning the computer screen to face
> the
> > printer but that his computer still couldn't "see" the printer."
> >
> > An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support couldn't get her new
>
> > Dell Computer to turn on. After ensuring the computer was plugged in,
> > the technician asked her what happened when she pushed the power
> > button. Her response, "I pushed and pushed on this foot pedal and
> > nothing happens." The "foot pedal" turned out to be the mouse.
> >
> > Another customer called Compaq tech support to say her brand-new
> > computer wouldn't work. She said she unpacked the unit, plugged it in
> > and sat there for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen. When
> > asked what happened when she pressed the power switch, she asked
> > "What power switch?"
> >
> > Another IBM customer had troubles installing software and rang for
> > support. "I put in the first disk, and that was OK. It said to put in
> the
> > second disk, and I had some problems with the disk. When it said to put
> > in the third disk, I couldn't even fit it in...." The user hadn't
> realized
> > that
> > "Insert Disk 2" meant to remove Disk 1 first.
> >
> > In a similar incident, a customer had followed the instructions for
> > installing software. The instructions said to remove the disk from its
> > cover and insert into the drive. The user had physically removed the
> > casing of the disk and wondered why there were problems.
> >
> > True story from a Novell NetWare Sysop: Caller: "Hello, is this Tech
> > Support?" Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?" Caller: "The cup
> > holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty period.
> > How do I go about getting that fixed?" Tech: "I'm sorry, but did you say
>
> > a cup holder?" Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."
>
> > Tech: "Please excuse me. If I seem a bit stumped, it's because I am.
> > Did you receive this as part of a promotional at a trade show? How did
> > you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?" Caller: It
> > came with my computer. I don't know anything about a promotion. It just
> > has '4X' on it." At this point, the Tech Rep had to mute the caller
> > because
> > he couldn't stand it. He was laughing too hard. The caller had been
> using
> > the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder and snapped it off
> > the drive.
> >
> > A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer. The
> > tech asked her if she was running it under "Windows." The woman
> > responded, "No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point.
> > The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window and his
> > printer is working fine."
> >
> > Tech Support: "O.K. Rob, let's press the control and escape keys at the
> > same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen.
> > Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager."
> > Customer: "I don't have a 'P'."
> > Tech: "On your keyboard, Rob."
> > Customer: "What do you mean?"
> > Tech: " 'P' on your keyboard, Rob."
> > Customer: "I'm not going to do that!"
> >
> > Now don't you feel better about your skill level?

Dylan
14-03-2003, 09:22 PM
Reminds me of when i was trying to dial through the internet with the LAN socket.

Had to call Ihug for about a month until the finally sent a guy around. Man i felt stupid!

cyberchuck
14-03-2003, 10:03 PM
Hehe...
Makes you feel sorry for those poor guys who work at tech support for some places.. My mum works at warranty for a company (not saying which) and some of the things she gets...


CyberChuck

Trev0
14-03-2003, 10:13 PM
That's america....

stu140103
14-03-2003, 10:53 PM
Hehehe....

I have to agree with CyberChuck about those poor tech support/helpdesk people the amount of abuse they get is amassing……

I was helping out on the Virtual Spectator help desk, during the Louis Vuitton & America's Cup, & each time they had problems (only two major problems from version 2 long sorry before then….) they where people wanting they money back saying why is this f***** not working etc.....etc…..

Chilling_Silence
15-03-2003, 01:53 AM
What about the guy who bought new PC and couldnt work out why nothing happened.. He followed the instructions and set it up right.. pushed the power button..

He was on the phone and the lady said to have a look behind and make sure it was all pressed on right..

his reply:
"Hold on while I get a flash-light, there's a power cut!"

Gotta wonder.. ;-)

Then again, we all gotta start somewhere :p

Misty
15-03-2003, 05:27 AM
I enjoyed reading the snippets - makes me feel a bit better re my own skill and a good laugh !

Anyway, I noticed that it is hard to read. I took a copy and ran it through a great little free program called ecleaner and got a great result.

If you are interested in the program (only 447KB) you can get it from:
[http://www.pcworld.com/downloads/file_description/0,fid,6492,00.asp]

:)

Clueless
15-03-2003, 08:09 AM
Misty,

How about posting the result for us to read to?

Pretty please!?!?!

.Clueless

Susan B
15-03-2003, 09:54 AM
Ya gotta laugh, tho' some of them are beyond belief really. :D

I still cringe when I remember back to when I got my first computer. The speakers just would not work and I was not happy. Phoned up the PC Direct "Lifeguard Support", told him the story and he had obviously heard it all before. "Plug them in the back of the computer, not in the hole on the CD-ROM" he said.

Oooops!! :8} :D

It must have cost PC Direct a fair bit because the next computer from them had a nice little sticker on the back with an arrow pointing to the speaker port and a message saying, "Plug speakers here".

The sticker is still there. :D

John H
15-03-2003, 09:55 AM
Zowee, I just downloaded ECleaner to try it out and it is great! Free too!

DON'T FEEL STUPID ABOUT USING YOUR COMPUTER

Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to "Press Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the Any Key is. SAT technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic bag the mouse was packaged in.

Another SAT customer was asked to send a copy of her defective diskettes. A few days later a letter arrived from the customer along with photocopies of the floppies.

Another Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer to fax anything. After 40 minutes of troubleshooting, the technician discovered the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it in front of the monitor screen and hitting the "send" key.

A Dell technician received a call from a customer who was enraged because his computer had told him he was "bad and an invalid."The tech explained that the computer's "bad command" and "invalid" responses shouldn't be taken personally.

A confused caller to IBM was having troubles printing documents. He told the technician that the computer had said it "couldn't find printer." The user had also tried turning the computer screen to face the printer but that his computer still couldn't "see" the printer."

An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support couldn't get her new Dell Computer to turn on. After ensuring the computer was plugged in, the technician asked her what happened when she pushed the power button. Her response, "I pushed and pushed on this foot pedal and nothing happens." The "foot pedal" turned out to be the mouse.

Another customer called Compaq tech support to say her brand-new computer wouldn't work. She said she unpacked the unit, plugged it in and sat there for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen. When asked what happened when she pressed the power switch, she asked "What power switch?"

Another IBM customer had troubles installing software and rang for support. "I put in the first disk, and that was OK. It said to put in the second disk, and I had some problems with the disk. When it said to put in the third disk, I couldn't even fit it in...." The user hadn't realized that "Insert Disk 2" meant to remove Disk 1 first.

In a similar incident, a customer had followed the instructions for installing software. The instructions said to remove the disk from its cover and insert into the drive. The user had physically removed the casing of the disk and wondered why there were problems.

True story from a Novell NetWare Sysop:
Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"
Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"
Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty period. How do I go about getting that fixed?"
Tech: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"
Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."
Tech: "Please excuse me. If I seem a bit stumped, it's because I am. Did you receive this as part of a promotional at a trade show? How did you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?"
Caller: It came with my computer. I don't know anything about a promotion. It just has '4X' on it."
At this point, the Tech Rep had to mute the caller because he couldn't stand it. He was laughing too hard. The caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder and snapped it off the drive.

A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer. The tech asked her if she was running it under "Windows." The woman responded, "No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window and his printer is working fine."

Tech Support: "O.K. Rob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager."
Customer: "I don't have a 'P'."
Tech: "On your keyboard, Rob."
Customer: "What do you mean?"
Tech: " 'P' on your keyboard, Rob."
Customer: "I'm not going to do that!"

Now don't you feel better about your skill level?

Misty
15-03-2003, 02:23 PM
I remember buying a printer and we could not get it to go. After a few days and many hours reading the manual we took it back to the shop.
There was a bit of styrofoam that was specially put in the part which moves back and forth (dot matrix machine), which was there to stop any movement in transit.
Took a second to remove ! If we had used our eyes better !!
:8}