View Full Version : Broland to be renamed Ripoffland.

30-08-2010, 06:41 PM
Iíve just returned from a small tour of the center of your north island.

I went to wytomo were they have light bug caves and other underground features, the chateau. Then down to lake tupo, I canít believe how the rugby and holden hoons behave there on a Saturday night. If they behaved like that in our place theyíd be locked up quick smart. Great piece of water. Good venison at the lodge.

Then I went over to rotoroa smelly place, on the way they took us past some hill that they wanted us to walk up. At the bottom was another black fella demanding to be given money to guide us up and down his hill. I passed not that I couldnít afford it I was getting tired of being treated like a cash cow by then.

Then I came back to Auckland, I went to the supermarket to check on these moth infected apples you have here that you say we have to let into Australia. I nearly had a heart attack at the price not only of the infected apples but of fruit and vegetables in general.

It explained to me why there are so many fat ugly things about on the streets itís because they canít afford to eat in a healthy manner, this business of GST on basic foods is wrong. We have some fatties at home but not as bad or as many as what you have here.

Then I did some research on what you are charging for accommodation for the rugby world cup. Untenable they must be using that sort of pricing to keep all the local rugby hoons away.

I was going to go to the south island as well but I am tired of being ripped off so instead me mate is going to take me to the barrier and the bay of islands on his boat at least he wont try to rip me off.

When I get back over west I shall tell all the boys to stop calling this place Broland or the land of the long brown bro and a start calling it Ripoffland or the land of the long brown rippoff merchant.

I shall also tell them not to bother coming here but to continue taking their leave at home or in Bali, Manila or Bangkok the service and prices are better and the street scenery is much easier on the eye.

Immigration officers in Canberra get called to a meeting and told that because of the financial crisis permanent residence and citizen ship admissions to Australia must be reduced by 75%

They are told they will be given 4 approved applications and they are to select 1 to be granted and write refusal letters for the other 3.

2 mates get given their 4 the first gets a kiwi a maori a Chinese and a pom family.
The other gets an Indian a maroi a pom and a kiwi Sheila.

At afternoon break the second says to the first which did you choose?

First bloke looks around for a hole to hide in and canít see one looks down at his brew and mutters the pomes.

2nd.sayís why them?

1st mutters best of a bad lot.

2nd says its okay, same here.

30-08-2010, 07:19 PM
Please go to Bali. Take some drugs smuggled in your arse.

With regards to the RWC, it's supply and demand.

30-08-2010, 07:43 PM

Each to their own.

30-08-2010, 08:23 PM
I do hope he's not looking for sympathy. Won't find any here.

Piss off back whence you came! Go and whinge and whine to your Ocker mates. They might appreciate you. We certainly don't. We can't stand moaning bloody Ockers.

30-08-2010, 09:41 PM

30-08-2010, 10:06 PM
peter2 / drb1 / angry has been banned, permanently.

Judges decision is final, no correspondence will be entered into, winners will be notified by mail within 14 days.


30-08-2010, 10:10 PM
Somehow I think all of us still left here have, in fact, won therefore there is no need to notify me by snail mail thus saving you the cost of a stamp. :)

The Error Guy
30-08-2010, 10:33 PM
What is this long bro cloud?... someone obvously obviously watches too much brotown and not enough of reality

30-08-2010, 11:49 PM
Reality TV seldom bears any resemblance to actual reality. I wonder what the popular reality shows would make NZ look like if they did a season here?

30-08-2010, 11:52 PM
At last!

Did make for a fun few days' reading though...

31-08-2010, 02:33 AM
At last!

Did make for a fun few days' reading though...

Does anyone want to bet that another account will not be created by the same person? Please not that I didn'y say sane person!

I had thought about Bipolar disorder but am now leaning toward Multiple Personality disorder.

31-08-2010, 03:37 AM
I have multiple personalities. And so do I. Me too!
I wouldn't be so paranoid if everybody stopped talking about me.
I used to be indesicive but now I'm not so sure...